🎧 Episode 3 – The First Visit: Clarity, Confusion, and the Watch and Wait Plan
Subtitle: Understanding the Diagnosis and Next Steps
Published October 21, 2025
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The Visit That Changed Everything
“They told me it was all in my head, but the truth was, it was a brain tumor.”
By the time I walked into the University of Virginia hospital for that first visit, my life had already split into two parts. The first was the one everyone saw, where I smiled, joked, and acted like everything was fine. The second was the quiet, anxious part that lived inside my thoughts, full of unanswered questions, late-night fears, and whispered prayers.
Episode 3 of I Have a What? Surviving a Brain Tumor takes you inside that moment, the first trip to UVA, the scan that confirmed the truth, and the conversation that explained what came next. This episode is about finding clarity and confusion at the same time. It is about what it means to hold on to faith when the path ahead feels uncertain.
The MRI – The Longest Hour of My Life
Before I met Dr. Kellogg, I had to complete an MRI. That first one felt endless. The room was cold and loud, filled with rhythmic knocking and humming that made it impossible to relax.
They told me to stay still, but how do you stay still when your entire world feels like it is shifting? I closed my eyes, thought of my wife, and prayed for peace. That hour inside the machine tested more than my patience. It tested my faith.
When it was over, I walked out feeling both relief and dread. Relief that it was done. Dread because the answers were coming soon.
Meeting Dr. Kellogg – The Conversation That Gave Context
When Dr. Kellogg entered the room, he had a calm, steady presence that helped me breathe. He reviewed my scans and said, “Johnathan, your tumor is in the parietal lobe. That part of your brain controls coordination and balance.”
Suddenly, everything began to make sense. The headaches, the dizziness, the blurred vision. My wife sat beside me taking notes while I tried to take it all in.
Then came the line that stayed with me:
“From what I can see, it looks benign and slow-growing. If you have to have one, this is the one to have.”
I nodded, but inside I thought, How can any tumor in my brain be the one to have?
The Watch and Wait Plan
That day, Dr. Kellogg laid out the next step. He said we would “watch and wait.” I would come in for MRI scans every six months to monitor the tumor.
It sounded simple, but living it was not. Watching and waiting meant living between two emotions: relief and fear. Each day was a mix of gratitude and quiet worry. Every headache made me question if something had changed.
“Watch and wait” became more than a medical plan. It became a mindset that required patience and faith. It forced me to learn that sometimes trusting God means not having control.
The Quiet Ride Home
The ride home from UVA was silent. My wife drove while I stared out the window, lost in thought. We were relieved that the tumor was not cancerous, but we both knew that life would never feel normal again.
Only my mom knew about my diagnosis at that point. To everyone else, I was fine. But privately, I was learning how to live with something invisible.
That drive represented what the next few months would feel like. Quiet, heavy, and uncertain, but still moving forward.
My Grandfather’s Lesson
Every episode is dedicated to my grandfather, who taught me that real strength comes from stillness. He used to say, “Be still. You can’t control the storm, but you can control how you show up in it.”
That wisdom became my anchor. “Watch and wait” no longer felt like doing nothing. It felt like trusting that some answers take time.
He taught me that peace is not the absence of storms. It is learning how to remain calm inside them.
Faith in the Waiting
Faith became my lifeline in that season. It did not erase fear, but it gave me focus. It reminded me that even in confusion, there is purpose.
Every prayer, every verse, and every quiet moment reminded me that waiting is not wasted time. It is preparation time.
What This Episode Teaches
Sometimes answers bring both peace and new uncertainty.
Faith does not remove fear, but it gives it direction.
Healing requires patience and surrender.
Waiting seasons teach trust more than action.
Listen to Episode 3
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